How did I get here? You keep asking yourself this question. Who did you expect to be here? You keep thinking if you had gone to this school, to this varsity, played in this circle you would be enough for this moment. Here is the scary thing, even if you had done those, the answer would have still been NO, you would have still been pondering on your enough-ness! What I have come to learn over the years is that, that voice in your head never stop! You have to develop the ability to be the observer of the voice not even to be in control, because that doesn’t happen. Other literature would call that, the Imposter Syndrome.
On that imposter syndrome, I would like to remind you of a story that your granny told you when you were growing up, on a Sunday afternoon when you returned from church in awe of a cousin of yours who had been attending ballet lessons that you were not able to because you didn’t have the financial means. When you asked your granny why your cousin could do ballet, she responded with what has since become my greatest insight about relating with the world. She simply asked you to look at her hand, because the unevenness of her fingers represented the state of the world. She said in this world, there will always be someone who has more than you, some who is better at something than you, someone with more means than you, smarter than you, but that is the state of the world, that however doesn’t mean that they are better; just like how every finger is carefully placed on your hand it plays a critical unique role, others are shorter, others are longer, but they are ENOUGH.
I am here to let you know that you are ENOUGH, just like every finger on your hand with its uniqueness. On excellence vs perfection. In my mind perfection is the achievement of a state of complacency in disguise while is the ability to give your best to every opportunity that is presented to you, and when you know better you do better therefore excellence is process of continuously evolving your greatness. Never become bigger than any opportunity presented to you, you might miss the learning opportunity presented to you by it. This will become a process of building your brand, the higher you go in your career the more you will depend on this brand speaking for you in rooms where you will not be able to speak for yourself.
On power and politics, if you are in a human system know that the fuel that makes these systems run is power and politics. I am in no way saying that play the politics, but it will be carelessly naïve to not be au fait with these. You might choose to not play the political game but you must know the game well so you can navigate it. NEVER EVER, give your power away, anyone in the system has power, the difference is how we all choose to exercise that power. So, when you do become aware of the power you hold in the system use it with care, grace, kindness and compassion, use it for the good. Mind you, I said when you become aware of it, because it has always been there. Do not be fooled into emasculating to advance your agenda because your femininity is enough, you are human before your woman, so do not let that be a distraction to the way you decide to use your power to navigate the political landscape that are these corporate establishments.
A book recommendation for you is, the Untethered Soul , by Michael A. Singer. I wish you al l the best, and always know that
YOU ARE ENOUGH!
Lots of love
Your older & wiser self
Some days you wish you can turn to your younger self and let her know everything is going to be okay...